I AM A WOUNDED HEALER

Before, i was a wounded man… Now, I am a Wounded Healer.

 

My name is JC Libiran, i am full-time lay missionary for the Light of Jesus Family & I lead our campus missions.

On the side I am a speaker, facilitator & author.But most important of all, I’ve been happily married for more than 2 years now to Emelyn. Ang sarap pakinggan noh? What I have shared with you is music to my ears.

Obviously, I’m blessed & I thank God for this. But for all of us, behind the success and happiness, are surely many difficult moments in our lives. Yes?!

Let me share with you one of the difficult times in my life. We are four siblings in the family and I’m the youngest. Among my siblings I’ve always had a difficult relationship with my eldest brother – How I wish Bro. Bo’s new book:“How to Deal with Difficult People” was available already during that time.

Now, let me give you a picture of how it looked like… since we were kids my eldest brother had been the #1 Bwisit… the #1 Badtrip… #1 Kontrabida in my life… #1 (3x). Others may have a life mission statement such as ‘no pain, no gain; no retreat, no surrender; & no ID, no entry’ but for my kuya, it was to hurt me and make me cry.

I remember one day when we were still young, I was busy playing with my toys and then he came up to me telling me to suit up for we will go for swimming. As a child, I got excited and I hurried to my room to wear my floral shorts and sando and then I inflated the salbabida (life saver) & put it around my body. When I came back to him I was even excitedly shouting, swimming! (3x).   But these were his words to me: “Where are you going? Who says that we will really go for swimming? It was a joke! Hahaha! Behhh :-P”

I could do anything about this and just walked out and went to my room and cried buckets of tears.

I believed in my heart that we would outgrow this rivalry but sad to say it even leveled up… AS IN. It was not world war but it was more of a WORD war. I ate toxic words for meryenda, agahan, tanghalian & hapunan. As if my kuya had a dictionary of bad words and I was his favorite target.

When we grew up, I said that I wouldn’t tolerate this when he starts shouting, P.I. ka, G.A.G.O. ka. After hearing this I would also shout back… P.I. ka rin… G.A.G.O. ka rin 100x & it felt good at first but eventually it was no longer healthy.

I was even praying the wrong prayers… I was telling God how I wish he was not my brother… or really to the extreme of praying na sana kunin na s’ya ni Lord.

 I’d like you to know that during that time I was already serving God in the community & people would hear me saying “Thank you, Sister… Sorry Brother. I Love You!!!” But when I went home I exchanged mean words with my brother.  I living a double life.

When I recall this I was only thinking of myself… I was already working during that time and my brother was jobless. I had a love life that time… he was loveless. Joblessness and lovelessness is a perfect combination for hopelessness. Bottomline, I was not able to put myself in his shoes.

Then I started not just to pray for myself… I started to lovingly pray for my brother… for his welfare and goodness. And I said that if I cannot change my brother… I’ll just put my faith in God who can change him.

So I made that choice that when he shouts at me I will no longer allow him to hurt me… I will no longer answer back. Then one time he shouted at me again… I was just still. And since he had no one to talk to he also gave up that fight… napagod na rin s’ya kasi wala na s’yang kausap.

 In God’s time, things started to fall into place… our fights became less and less.. I even leveled up in my praying and in my loving. I started bringing him pasalubong whenever I get home. At first he was completely ignoring this but eventually he gave in to this. I just made that decision to love him.

Then one day, the unthinkable happened… he knocked at my door and his words blew me away… he said,Before you leave I prepared food for you… pinagluto kita ng tortang talong, kumain ka.”

Whooowww! As much as I wanted to clap and appreciate it actually I got scared… because I was worried that it might have poison. . But to show courtesy I still ate it and even if I was hesitant, would you believe that I ate everything he prepared and in fact hindi ko na s’ya natiran. Hehehe. I won’t forget that meal… it was the best tortang talong everrr and I won’t forget that day… Why? It was my birthday.

To this date… my brother is no longer difficult. Praise God! He has a small business and he has a love life. In fact he got me as the ninongs of his son. Now, we go out for dates and fellowship. God continues to heal and bless our relationship.

 Friends, I have been a wounded man for so many years… but now through God’s grace I AM A WOUNDED HEALER.

Indeed, there is healing and forgiveness in God’s time… and in God’s hands.

 Now, I share my story to testify how God healed me and how he continues to heal me in my brokenness.

 This is not just my story. This is His story.

 

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